Grateful Dad #22: A Change In Perspective
One of the greatest lessons that I have learned over the last several years is that a simple change in perspective can do wonders for you. Changing your perspective can make you happier, improve your outlook towards your work, and generally makes you even more appreciative of what you have and not be fussy about what you don’t have. Best of all, I think it’s the secret to a strong and lasting relationship.
Grateful Dad #22: A Change In Perspective
Mommy Khris and I have been married for eight years now. We celebrated our wedding anniversary last April 8. While we didn’t go on a romantic dinner date that time, it didn’t matter to us because we were with our kids in Pico de Loro. Anyway, eight years and it still feels like we were just married the previous month. Yes, a lot of things may have changes especially now that we have two kids but eight years didn’t feel like a drag at all.
I think the reason behind it is that Mommy Khris and I are happy and contented with what we have. We love and respect each other and honestly, I couldn’t imagine myself being with another person other than Mommy Khris. If you ask me what’s my secret to a lasting relationship, I would say that you should always put things into their proper perspective. More importantly, change your perspective when you feel that you are already questioning too much or demanding too much from your partner.
First of all, it’s good to remember that no relationship is ideal. That’s one good way of putting things into perspective. A couple is composed of two different individuals who bring with them their own set of values, beliefs, family background, and even interests. Having said that, you are bound to have misunderstandings and clashes. Now, unless your partner has a bad habit that needs to be changed, it’s up to you to adjust and to meet them halfway.
Mommy Khris and I have also had our fair share of misunderstandings. Admittedly, at some point, I also wanted to change some things in our relationship. Nevertheless, I realized that I can’t always be in control of the situation and that I should learn to see the situation from a different angle or perspective. That’s what I did and it worked. In a way, it’s also learning to give to your partner instead of always taking.
For example, if you are getting irritated because your partner is not able to cook food for you, instead of constantly demanding that from your partner, try to understand that they might not have that skill or maybe they’re just too exhausted from work or from taking care of the kids.
So instead of looking at the things that your partner doesn’t possess, see the good things that they have such as taking care of you in other ways like making sure that you have packed meals before going to work or that your clothes are fresh and crisp so that you are always looking your best.
Changing your perspective also applies to how you take care of your kids. For example, during one of Miguel’s home activities, he was being less focused than usual. It was just a repeat of our past activities, which he previously did quite efficiently, but now he was having a hard time finishing them. With that, I was already losing my patience and getting frustrated.
So, what we did was we took a break, I let him rest a little, carried on, and finished his activities. After that, he fell asleep and only then did I realize that he might just be sleepy that’s why he was having a hard time. With that, I told myself that the next time Miguel becomes a little out of focus, I should consider the fact that he might just be tired and not deliberately being cooperative.
In the end, instead of questioning things too much or looking for divine intervention, we should just stop a little, assess the situation, try to look at the situation from a different angle. More often than not, the answers to our concerns are right in front of us.
Do you agree with me? Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.